I don't know what I did - but I somehow angered Yahweh and he smited me. Smote me? At any rate he, being the vengeful deity he is, sent a plague of locusts upon my house.
Or, maybe I had a stomach bug for a few days. But it felt like I was being smoten upon. You forget just how terrible a stomach bug is until you are leaning out of a car window projectile vomiting on the road below. TMI? sorry. I'll hold back the other gory details. All I can say is I wouldn't wish that illness on my worst enemy. Except if I had a specific suicide bomber enemy. Then maybe I would wish that illness upon him.