I was sitting in class tonight thinking about all the reasons I hate UMass. Then I realized that my long suffering readers have been forced to hear all about my hatred for the school and I very rarely list the reasons why. So here you go, long suffering readers. The reasons why UMB is terrible.

1. I have gone to school there for 3 years. Not once have I been in a room that contained a white board. Now I know that's not really a reason to hate a school. But it just shows how ass backwards the school truly is.

2. One word. Wireless. We have 6 buildings on campus. One building is wireless. The remaining 5? Well if you're lucky, there might be a "zone" in your building. Then again, there might not be one at all.

3. I cannot get a library card because I can't get to the student services office in normal business hours. Why? Right, because I work normal business hours. I use the Brandeis bookstore instead. I shouldn't have to do that.

4. Fees. Oh my god in heaven, the incessant fees. They actually have a fee that they ADMIT is there to make up the difference between what we pay in tuition and what other universities would charge. THE FUCK!?!?!?!?!? Just charge it all as tuition and stop lying. Honestly. Who cares what your tuition is if your fees are triple the tuition.

5. Parking.... this is a topic I have covered in the past. To rehash: UMB is a commuter school that is a series of building built over parking garages. In the summer of 06 the closed the parking garages forever, never open again. I'll say that again. THEY CLOSED THE PARKING GARAGES AT A COMMUTER SCHOOL. The reason? They were structurally unsafe. But don't worry, they insist the buildings on top of the garages are fine. Apparently they will just float in the air when the garages that are supporting them crumble away. Leviosa!!!


There are more reasons, but my language is getting away from me, as it is want to do when I'm livid. So I'll end this now and fantasize I am back in the SAC.